Putting a face on the CURRENT health care crisis

I would like to take a moment to give you my own, personal story. Not talk about "what scary thing might or might not happen under a hypothetical public option plan" ... but what has happened, is happening, and will likely happen under the health care system we have today.

Many of you have been very lucky to have health benefits and haven't had to go without insurance coverage for any (or lengthy) amounts of time. You people are the lucky ones, really. I envy all of you... I also feel very sad when I hear people who haven't fallen on hard times start talking out of their wallets, because they can't empathize with anyone who hasn't experienced continuous health care coverage.

I've had both experiences. Here is my story...

Once upon a time in the 1990s, I was married. Believe it! I really was! And during that time, while I was a part-time student pursuing a degree for a better life for my family and a part-time stay-at-home parent to provide loving care for my little ones when they needed it most, my then-husband had a decent job that planted us firmly into the middle class and also gave us all health insurance coverage.

During that time, I could pick from a list of providers and get seen wherever and whenever I needed care for pretty much everything, so long as the care came from one of their providers. I call this time the "salad days." Being that I have a heart condition: paroxysmal supraventricular tachycardia (PSVT). I was so happy to have health insurance and to be working towards finding a way to manage it and maybe someday cure it (the cure hadn't been perfected just yet).

For reasons outside of my control, my marriage fell apart when I was not even 29 years old. I managed to keep the divorce amicable, despite extremely emotional reasons for the divorce (his affair) and, perhaps partially out of guilt, he agreed to keep our three kids and me covered under his insurance plan via COBRA for a period of some years.

That all worked out just fine and dandy for a time... until about 1.5 years post-divorce, he suddenly decided to cancel that COBRA plan for all of us. As if that isn't bad enough, he did this the day after I asked him not to cancel that plan for at least a month, because my cardiologist said that I was finally considered a "prime candidate" for the surgical procedure that would cure me of the PSVT forever.

I learned that my insurance was canceled from my cardiologist, who, when calling to get approval for the surgery, was told by the insurance company that my ex-husband had just canceled it. I could hear disbelief in his voice as he relayed this information to me, actually choking up as he said, "The worst part is, now that you have this diagnosis, you will likely never be covered under any other insurance plan for this cure or for continued care."

I was devastated, to say the least.

But I had to pick up the pieces somehow. Being that I was still enrolled in graduate school, I did not have an employer offering insurance coverage. I qualified my children for Medicaid coverage, so that I would at least not have to worry about them. Then I started my research to find someone willing to give me private, independent insurance.

After a few months of searching, I settled on Blue Cross Blue Shield. The initial online review of my history told me that they would not cover anything heart-related for a period of 3 years, but my premiums would only be $189 per month. It would be tough, but I could do that... just cut out extra expenses here and there.

When they sent me the legal agreement to sign, suddenly the wording had changed to no heart-related coverage for a period of 5 years, but the premium hadn't changed, so I agreed and signed. Several weeks later, the finalized insurance plan and cards came in the mail to me: no cardio-related coverage for a period of 6 years. Huh? They just arbitrarily changed it AFTER I had signed on the dotted line? That can't be right!

I called to tell them of their typo and the person cheerfully, but firmly told me that it wasn't an error and they were allowed to change the terms up to that point, but that I could rest assured that no changes would be made until my one-year review with them.

Begrudgingly, I continued with BCBS, because I needed to be able to see doctors... GYN, annual check-ups, that sort of thing. After just 5 months with them, I got a letter in the mail stating that my plan had been reviewed and now my premium had jumped to $396 per month... more than double!

After picking myself up off the floor, I called BCBS and told them that surely there had been a mistake, because I was still a fairly new member.

BCBS CSR: "You were reviewed because you have been with us for one year and after each year of service, we review our customers' files for changes in their medical history."

Me: "Um, no. I've only been with you for 5 months."

BCBS CSR: "Then you were reviewed because you had some sort of major change in your health, requiring you to see a specialist on an on-going basis."

Me: "No again. I only had an annual gynecology appointment and one dermatology appointment. Nothing has changed."

BCBS CSR: "Well, then you were reviewed because you had passed into a new age bracket in that time."

Me: "What? No, I'm still 31. I haven't even had a birthday yet this year! It's in December. Besides, I won't move up into the next age group for a couple of years."

BCBS CSR: "I'm sure there was a reason. It's just not showing on my screen right now. Is there anything else I can help you with?"

Me: "Yeah, you can help me decide if I should continue having health insurance or if I should continue feeding my children. I am just going to have to cancel my insurance, obviously."

BCBS CSR: "I can't help you with that over the phone. You will have to send your request in writing to us. Is there anything else that I can help you with today?"

Me: "No, you've already been so not helpful enough for today. Thank you."


That was mid-2002. Around that same time, I had to go to a meeting of creditors in bankruptcy court, because my ex-husband had filed and was trying to get out of back child support payments to me through that. While there, I listened to case after case of people who were going through bankruptcy, and more than half of them were medical-related bankruptcies. The courtroom looked like an emergency room, filled with wheelchairs and crutches and oxygen tanks and whatnot. I was stunned at what the cost of healthcare was doing to people's lives.

I have been without health insurance ever since that Blue Cross Blue Shield fiasco. I am NOT one of the people who "chooses to go naked" on this. I have no choice, it's just not affordable or available to me. Between finishing grad school and looking for work and only finding menial jobs that do not include health benefits, it has been a VERY rough go of things. I am thankful every day that my children are covered, but I try not to think about myself too much. If I get sick, I have to self-medicate. I live in pain every day from a surgery that I had 10 years ago, but I can't seek help for that, so I just try to ignore it.

But deep down, I know the true score. If I should get sick with something life threatening that needs expensive, long-term treatments (i.e. cancer), I will likely either have to lose my house to cover it or I will have to go without and let the illness take me. Those are my options now. And unless something changes... I miraculously land a job with great health care benefits, or our country changes drastically... that will be my fate.

I would just like you all to know now, while I think I am still healthy, that there is a possibility that someday, you may lose a friend... a real person whom you actually know... to the sick state of our health care system today. There are thousands of people who needlessly go untreated and have to die every year, because they cannot afford any other alternative. Think about that when you worry about the possibility of having to wait a little extra to see a doctor due to a "socialized" form of medicine.

And don't sit there so smugly, comfortable in your health care options now, because you never know when those will get yanked away from you, too. All it takes is one major illness that causes you to lose that job with the great health care for you to understand where I, and so many other Americans, are coming from today.

I apologize if that sounds angry at the end. I am, a bit. Which is why I try not to think about my situation... but it angers me when I think of all the people who are losing their insurance coverage and/or dying right now due to inadequate coverage. It hurts my uncovered heart.