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Friday, December 14, 2012

Top of the World!

Tonight, tragedy hit this household. Or so it seemed. 


While removing the cover of a perfectly defrosted and completely untouched coconut cream pie that I'd bought for my birthday, the beautiful thing slipped from my hands and ended up on the floor upside-down, of course. I now had floor pie. Again. (Yes, I've done this before. No, I haven't learned from it.) Not completely inedible floor pie, mind you, but mostly wasted. As I was savoring a few creamy spoonfuls of non-floor touching parts, I realized a few positive things had come of this accident.

Saddest sight ever, after I'd flipped it back over (and tasted some of it).

First, the way it splattered on the floor--it's light fluffy texture splayed out around the edges as well as melting in my mouth--made me realize why the coconut cream pie has always been the clown favorite for a pie in the face. Genius and tasty, who could be mad? I'm remembering this the next time I think I might like to surprise someone with a face pie. I'm thinking it's a different reaction than the resounding sadness and disappointment I usually get from people over my floor pie.

"I don't fight, Baby. I'm a lover!" A pie lover, that is.

Second, I probably should not have been left alone with that whole pie anyway, because I most definitely would have eaten from it until I was sick ... then probably eat some more after a nap. All of my workouts would be for naught for weeks! This way, I got to taste it, which is really all I wanted, and not lose control. Silver lining!

"Any world that can produce the Taj Mahal, William Shakespeare,
and Stripetoothpaste can't be all bad."

So while I'm on this topic of silver linings, I thought I'd write up a few of the other awesome things that seemed like tragedies, but quickly turned awesome lately:

1) A few weeks back, a huge, dead tree branch fell on my super awesome Nissan Cube, Mothra. I love that damn car, so naturally, I was mega bummed about the damage. However, nothing could've gone smoother with the repair, the worst part of which was having to be without Mothra for 10 days, while I drove a dull Mazda. When I returned the Mazda, the Enterprise clerk was stunned to learn that it wasn't in their system anymore because it had sold. Guess someone learned that a world famous blogger was driving it and have to have it!

That rental was completely free, by the way, and my deductible was so stunningly low, people gasped when they heard at the repair shop. But before I even paid them a dime for the repair, I'd received a check for double my deductible from Allstate because of Mothra's "diminished value" or something. Then just today, I received a letter from Allstate saying, "We'd like to give you an extra $300 dollars for your car's diminished value and for you being so awesome." Or something like that. As my boyfriend put it, "You got hit by a money tree!" I did, indeed.

"You and your 14 karat oomph!"

2) Speaking of Mothra, she and I were recently pulled over for speeding in Byron County, Georgia by a very sweet, young officer, who complimented me on my rear-view mirror disco ball, to which I cheerily replied, "Yeah, and it looks extra awesome with your pretty colored lights flashing in it!" He ended up letting me off with a warning, despite the fact that I qualified for a "super speeder" ticket. Just to be extra nice, he even clued me in to the fact that I'd be fine if I "just keep the cruise control at 80." (The speed limit is 70.) I didn't even have to cry and/or show cleavage!

"Well, that's the kind of a hairpin I am."

This would be awesome in and of itself, but it's also the third time in the last year that I've dealt with sweet, young police officers for things that were clearly my fault, only to have them bend over backwards to be super sweet to me. They all could easily have been cop strippers in their off hours, if they wanted to be, too. I'm just sayin'.

3) And I wouldn't have even had that fun cop experience if I wasn't coming back from my awesome boyfriend weekend. This is the best part of all of the good things of late (which are too many to write here), is that I lined myself up with this really awesome, great-fit of a guy. "'Bout time," you say? I know, right!?

How is this part of the tragedy-turned-awesome sauce? If you recall, it seemed a few months back that I'd failed at yet another relationship attempt with someone else, but in actuality I had already met the one that I really wanted to know better. That "zing" that I felt on the first in-person meeting grabbed me and hasn't let go. As a matter of fact, if it just keeps getting stronger, I may literally burst. I think the most most accurate description of that feeling was given earlier tonight, when we had this exchange:


Without giving away too much of the bursty magic, I'll just share these photos with you all here, to let you soak in whatever you infer. These were taken years (decades?) apart, but you can just assume that every picture taken between those shots was equally awesome (along with every moment), because I truly can't tell the difference if they aren't: 

Photo courtesy of his ex-wife, who calls this one "Frolic."

And I call this one "Magically Delicious!"

I know he loves these odes that I keep posting about him here (although publicly he'll deny it), so I'll just keep going.

In his self-deprecating humor, he recently referred to himself (I'm using "himself" very loosely here) as occasionally being a bit like Peter Lorre (which I am more than okay with):


But I think it would be just as accurate to say he's (also using "he" loosely) a kinder, less-punchy Jimmy Cagney:


What do you mean you don't see it? Here, look again: 




Uncanny, isn't it!?
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