It can and did happen! Tell-all blog about dating ... well, tell-most ... tell-some ... regardless, it's TMI.
Monday, May 21, 2007
Don't poke the bear!
I'm busy editing something and very VERY sleep deprived. Until I'm done, I won't be blogging for real... so just be happy with these sometimes informative and sometimes idiotic quizzes. It's all I have time for right now.
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Meanwhile, on the other side...
I'm sure that right about now Jerry Falwell is finally realizing how big of an idiot he actually was.
Monday, May 07, 2007
Web of Deceipt
Going into it, I was worried that too many villians (3 in all... 4 if you count the "goo") would spoil the plot. Ultimately, however, it wasn't the number of extra evil-doers that ruined Spiderman 3, but rather it was the highest degree of schmaltz-factor since they invented "weepies" in the 30s.
Let me give you some examples you can relate to...
You know how George Lucas thought Jar Jar Binks would be a great addition to Phantom Menace? And remember how the "American people" thought George W. Bush would be good for this country? Well, that's how bad of an idea all the love, forgiveness and misty-eyed moments are in Spiderman 3.
Of course, I've seen the syrupy treacle of the Spiderman flicks from the beginning... back when it was blasphemy to speak badly of the webbed one. In the sappy voiceover ending of the first story, when Peter Parker is saying, "No matter what I do, no matter how hard I try, the ones I love will always be the ones who pay," I quickly leaned over to Cully and said aloud what came to mind: "What? Like at the movies and dinner? Will his loved ones be saying, 'Dammit, Peter! When are you going to pay? Bring a wallet! Enough of this 'it's my gift, my curse' bullshit.'" He and I didn't stop laughing, much to the disdain of some of the dorks around us.
This time, the line came from Harry "Hobgoblin" Osborn, when Peter wanted to help save him and he says, "No, don't." I leaned over and added to my pal Kevin, "He doesn't want to be brought back for an even crappier movie."
There's another line near the end (not close enough, of course) where Peter Parker says something about making the right choice. I wish Sam Raimi had made the right choice and just cut two-thirds of the movie. I know you'll still go see it, and I suggest you do, if only to kill off any urges to want to see another sequel. Besides, with the over-the-top melodrama of this film, I'm pretty sure that a Latin telanovela will step in and continue the story... look for a guy in a Little Dutchboy wig and another guy in a bumblebee costume to star as the next villians.
**footnote**
Originally, when I typed in the title "Web of Deceipt" it was a play on the old movie title Web of Deceit combined with the word "receipt" ... and I was going to go into this whole rant about the cost of making movies, going to movies, time is money, money is money, Sam Raimi is a sellout, box office receipts, on and on, blah blah blah. I suppose at some point, I decided not to go with that whole angle and left the title with no explanation. After posting, I went back and changed it to the correct spelling, but just now decided to change it back to the original. At the expense of me looking like an idiot, if a typo gets people to stop and read this thing, it might actually save them valuable time and money later. I'm willing to take that risk. Besides, I'm getting used to looking like an idiot. It's my gift... my curse.
***addendum***
How could I have forgotten something that bugged the piss out of me at the time? The issue... what exactly is a woman's role in the Spiderman franchise? I'll ask Sean, since he seems to be the self-proclaimed expert. But as far as I can tell, a woman's role is to look pretty, to be none-too-bright, to have a subordinate or menial job, to be courted and/or fought over by the male leads, and then to get into danger so she can be rescued. OR, she's a matronly dispenser of advice, who shows up far too often and doesn't really propel the plot forward, except to reconfirm our notions that the hero is actually a coddled mama's boy. And while I'm on this tirade, what is a person of color's role in this franchise? From what I've gathered, it's to show up at funerals and jazz clubs, or else to wander around looking flustered by other people's one-liners or exploits (i.e. the newsroom). Doesn't anyone else get bothered by this stuff?
Let me give you some examples you can relate to...
You know how George Lucas thought Jar Jar Binks would be a great addition to Phantom Menace? And remember how the "American people" thought George W. Bush would be good for this country? Well, that's how bad of an idea all the love, forgiveness and misty-eyed moments are in Spiderman 3.
Of course, I've seen the syrupy treacle of the Spiderman flicks from the beginning... back when it was blasphemy to speak badly of the webbed one. In the sappy voiceover ending of the first story, when Peter Parker is saying, "No matter what I do, no matter how hard I try, the ones I love will always be the ones who pay," I quickly leaned over to Cully and said aloud what came to mind: "What? Like at the movies and dinner? Will his loved ones be saying, 'Dammit, Peter! When are you going to pay? Bring a wallet! Enough of this 'it's my gift, my curse' bullshit.'" He and I didn't stop laughing, much to the disdain of some of the dorks around us.
This time, the line came from Harry "Hobgoblin" Osborn, when Peter wanted to help save him and he says, "No, don't." I leaned over and added to my pal Kevin, "He doesn't want to be brought back for an even crappier movie."
There's another line near the end (not close enough, of course) where Peter Parker says something about making the right choice. I wish Sam Raimi had made the right choice and just cut two-thirds of the movie. I know you'll still go see it, and I suggest you do, if only to kill off any urges to want to see another sequel. Besides, with the over-the-top melodrama of this film, I'm pretty sure that a Latin telanovela will step in and continue the story... look for a guy in a Little Dutchboy wig and another guy in a bumblebee costume to star as the next villians.
**footnote**
Originally, when I typed in the title "Web of Deceipt" it was a play on the old movie title Web of Deceit combined with the word "receipt" ... and I was going to go into this whole rant about the cost of making movies, going to movies, time is money, money is money, Sam Raimi is a sellout, box office receipts, on and on, blah blah blah. I suppose at some point, I decided not to go with that whole angle and left the title with no explanation. After posting, I went back and changed it to the correct spelling, but just now decided to change it back to the original. At the expense of me looking like an idiot, if a typo gets people to stop and read this thing, it might actually save them valuable time and money later. I'm willing to take that risk. Besides, I'm getting used to looking like an idiot. It's my gift... my curse.
***addendum***
How could I have forgotten something that bugged the piss out of me at the time? The issue... what exactly is a woman's role in the Spiderman franchise? I'll ask Sean, since he seems to be the self-proclaimed expert. But as far as I can tell, a woman's role is to look pretty, to be none-too-bright, to have a subordinate or menial job, to be courted and/or fought over by the male leads, and then to get into danger so she can be rescued. OR, she's a matronly dispenser of advice, who shows up far too often and doesn't really propel the plot forward, except to reconfirm our notions that the hero is actually a coddled mama's boy. And while I'm on this tirade, what is a person of color's role in this franchise? From what I've gathered, it's to show up at funerals and jazz clubs, or else to wander around looking flustered by other people's one-liners or exploits (i.e. the newsroom). Doesn't anyone else get bothered by this stuff?
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