25 Things

1. I posted something akin to this back in November on Facebook, got several people excited perhaps, then failed on the follow through to tell them things that I thought about them in time, before I completely lost the thread entirely here. I apologize everyone.


2. When I make a sandwich for myself, I can never have the condiments touch the cheese. The cheese can touch the meat or the bread, but it cannot come into contact with any condiments. This is a strict policy of mine, but I make exceptions when other people make me a sandwich just to be polite.


3. I always let politeness trump my own comfort. I can admire those of you who speak up for yourself... some of you are probably labeled as "high maintenance" by those who know you as a result. I, however, am terribly shy and completely anti-confrontational, and most people have no clue just how much things bother me, because I don't believe in dumping my issues on them.


4. I didn't get married until five months after my third child was born. Some would call this putting the cart before the horse, or back-assward, perhaps. I just didn't see the point until then, I guess. I also didn't change my name at the time, because I didn't want to become just another "Jones" on the planet. Good thing, since we divorced just two years later.


5. I can't stand crowds. At one time, this phobia of mine had gotten so bad (without me realizing it) that when I tried to meet friends for lunch at a restaurant and found it crowded, I couldn't eat or swallow anything. I overcame that phobia by forcing myself to go out to eat as often as possible at various times of the day. I'm okay now, but I still generally hate crowds.


6. As a result of my crowd loathing, I also hate crowded elevators. I have broken out into complete but invisible (thanks to my fear of making scenes or being a bother to anyone) panic attacks while stuck at the back of elevators too many times. This is something that I can't seem to overcome. It's not the confined space that scares me. It's the fact that one of the people in the elevator might go nuts and kill us all that scares me.


7. I don't trust anyone completely. You'd never know it, because I'm so polite and all, but the secret is out now. Just accept it and move on.


8. While we're on this path, do not make me the center of attention EVER. Just don't, okay!


9. In a fun twist, I've always been drawn to extroverts, like my boyfriend, for instance, who incidentally is sitting next to me right now and offering to come up with my list of 25 things for me while insisting that I only write nice things about him in this list... the list that is supposed to be about me. (Yes, that was my direct attempt at appeasing his wish that everything should be about him.)


10. I used to be a pinball whiz kid and had the capabilities of becoming a total pool shark, all when I was too short to see over either table. I don't mean this in the "I used to be pretty good at pinball" sort of way... I mean I couldn't lose and could rack up points in a way that they make rock operas about. I don't know what happened to those abilities, but they don't seem to exist anymore. I've never lost a game of chess, if that still counts.


11. I am a trained artist... went to art school and everything... but you'd never know it today. I still have a great eye, however.


12. I rescue animals to a degree that would be considered pathological by some. If I had the money and the space, I'd have my own shelter. I can't stand it when people do not spay/neuter their pets and animal abuse of any kind can throw me into a violent rage... and I'm a pacifist.


13. While I'm labeling myself, I guess I should say that I'm also basically a Socialist... a Progressive Socialist is more like it. It's okay if you call me names like "Liberal" or "Pinko" or try to make fun of me for these values, but you'll never convert me, so don't even try. As a matter of fact, don't try to convert me to any of your personal preferences. I've been this way my whole life, despite being raised by one highly conservative parent and one totally apolitical parent.


14. I'm a recovering blogger. My blog still exists, because I wrote it for about 4 years, but I really don't post anymore. This is perhaps the closest thing I've done to that in many, many moons.


15. As a video editor, I have edited porn. It seems so passé now, with all that you can find on the internet, but there you have it.


16. A few years ago, I studied to develop my psychic abilities just to see if I could, and got some very interesting results. Then I totally stopped and haven't messed with any of that since.


17. My nose has been broken 3 times, all due to my incredible clumsiness. I've broken my toes 3 times as well... same reason.


18. I'm terrified of spiders and must secrete something appealing that draws them to me no matter where I am.


19. Dogs, babies and old people love me. Perhaps it's the same spider-perfume that attracts them, too? I don't mind the babies and old people as much as the spiders. And I love dogs, so that suits me just fine.


20. I have a total black thumb. Do not ask me to take care of your prized plants for more than a week or you'll find out the truth. I happen to have two lucky bamboo plants in my kitchen that I've had for a couple years now, but they don't have any luck to offer me, because they're using it all just to keep alive themselves.


21. I like big butts (and I cannot lie)... specifically, I'm talking about horses with big butts. I used to make my parents take me to see the Clydesdales at the Budweiser brewing plant all the time when we lived in New England. They usually obliged... perhaps it was all the free beer that was the incentive, however, rather than my pure glee.


22. I love the free-fall sensation, which is another reason that I know it's not the elevator itself that scares me. If I have a chance to ride a roller coaster or any big drop type of ride, I'm there.


23. Conversely, I'm still a little scared of escalators. This comes from when I fell down a flight of metal-rimmed stairs at my grandmother's house as a wee child, I think. But to this day, if you're watching closely you'll notice me do this hesitant little two-step thing before I step on any moving escalator. I thought that I had it under control, but I've been spotted doing this twice in recent years, so I guess I need to work on that.


24. I absolutely love the smell of magic markers, movie theater popcorn, and puppy breath.


25. I hate the taste of licorice, Brussels sprouts, and lamb.