Your social competence and charm make it easy for you to get along well with most people. Indeed, it’s self-confidence that allows people to feel comfortable interacting with others without feeling insecure and vulnerable. This should work to your advantage in your romantic life. Your social skills should help make for a pleasant first date by alleviating any nervousness that your partner might have. Over time, the realistic standards that you tend to set for yourself could work well with your partner. That is, by setting realistic goals for yourself and your relationships, your partners should feel less pressure to be someone that they are not.
Given how much you value family life, you probably get along best with people who share your values and beliefs. In fact, it’s likely that you maintain close connections with members of your immediate and distant family. For this reason, you would probably be most satisfied in a romantic relationship with someone who also values domestic life.
Being in a relationship with someone who enjoys going out to parties and staying-up late at night might be fun, at least initially; yet it’s likely that you will find this tiring over time. Thus, it might be easier and more satisfying for you to develop a long-lasting relationship with a person who also enjoys spending time at home and desires starting a family. On first dates, perhaps you might suggest to your partner that the two of you spend a quiet night having dinner at one of your respective homes instead of going out to a restaurant or club.
As someone who is more relaxed than most people, you likely get along with most people quite well. Chances are that your friends and colleagues perceive you as lively, fun to be with, and good-humored. When it comes to romance, you’ll likely be attracted to most people. However, your free-spirited nature might make being in a relationship with a person that is more rigid than you difficult because you might perceive the person as being too uptight and controlling.
Your openness probably makes it easy for you to respect and appreciate people that are different from you. However, you may become frustrated with people that are too unconventional or traditional. Therefore, you may be happiest in serious relationships with people that share both your open-mindedness and realistic nature.
I think that last paragraph sums up where I get into the most trouble in relationships. Too often, I accept major personality issues and lifestyle changes with a partner, especially early on, and that tends to be my downfall for anything long-lasting. You may be of the belief that "opposites attract," and hey... that's great for you. Do not let me tell you how to live your life. However, the truth is out there by studies of long-lasting relationships that major differences in background, personality, beliefs and lifestyle are absolutely not what make for a lasting relationship.
I'm working on it... being more selective, that is. I got a lot of flack for what used to be my introductory paragraph on a certain dating site that rhymes with "OK Stupid," but really, it was me just telling it like it is. I know what works for me and I know what doesn't. Then I deleted it and received messages that some folks were sad to see that list go, because they saw it as such a good opener.
For the sake of that latter group, and for the sake of making a better connection in the future, here's what my profile opener used to say... leaving it here in case anyone (including myself) still needs clarity someday:
Please save your "winks" if you are:
- in a relationship of any kind.
- looking for casual sex.
- into the whole BDSM lifestyle.
- in the market for a new polyamory partner.
- into drugs or heavy drinking as a favorite pastime.
- anything more than a social smoker.
- one of those people for whom lying is second nature.
- Bipolar or possibly have Borderline Personality Disorder.
- deeply in need of anger management therapy.
- Conservative, Libertarian, or have a Right-Wing agenda.
- buying into a religion, which mandates that homosexuals, abortion providers, or stem-cell researchers are going to Hell.
- someone who believes that Hell is a place "below" where a horned, red devil tortures souls with fire and brimstone.
